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Confusion

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[excerpt from FREE, Getting real with life, unlimited].

Sometimes we can seem so utterly confused that it looks like we have no idea of how to move forward. We don’t even know what to do let alone have the freedom to act on it.

A few years ago, I found myself in a state of total overwhelm. My head was in chaos. I couldn’t sleep or really eat. I couldn’t pretend to be my normal self with friends so I avoided company.  I was shaking, exhausted and low. I was looking into the future and all I saw…

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Want a Thriving Solo Business?

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[Excerpt from EASE].

Maybe you have seen for yourself how sometimes work seems complicated and sometimes straightforward.

Maybe you have questioned how free will can be possible when there is no control over which thoughts come to mind and over which are believed.

Maybe you have seen how everything you think about yourself and what you do can change. And that therefore your nature is pure potential not a fixed limited identity.

Maybe you have noticed the freedom of those moments at work of n…

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Ready for it?

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The lottery started in the UK in 1994 and my sister suggested that our family should have a syndicate. Every Saturday we sat in the living room seeing if our numbers would come up. My 93 year old grandmother would sit there, not saying a word, hardly breathing until all the numbers had been chosen. Then, when, once again, it was clear we hadn’t won anything she would let out a sigh of relief and thank God for sparing us…

Her relief often comes to mind when people describe their dream life. The …

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We Are Love

we are love

From everything I have read about self and reality over the years, all the teachings I have attended or watched I’m going to take a punt and say that the only thing that seems to be acknowledged across the board is our true nature of unconditional love.

Everything else — consciousness, intelligence, wisdom, non-duality, nothingness, being-ness, formless, form, ego, spirituality, reality — all of that is either under some degree of dispute, or different teachers have different ways of talking ab…

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What is really needed?

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[Excerpt from 'It's not you... and it's not me']


In the midst of our suffering, we have a skewed view of what is really needed. And the greater the suffering, the more skewed the need and the more desperate we are to get it.

It looked like I needed the man to make me feel valid and worthy.  The only way he could do that would have been by convincing me how much he cared about me, how special I was…

Because then I would feel OK. My self-esteem would be intact. My view of the weekend I had ju…

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They are love. They are us. We are love.

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[Excerpt from 'It's not you... and it's not me']

Finally…

finally…

…we get to meet the other person. Well, as close as possible as it is to meet them.

The perception of them still belongs to us, the perceiver.

But with less and less projection of the innermost needs and insecurities onto them, there is now nothing pushing them away.

With less and less meaning of who they are, there are no barriers between us.

With less and less depending on their responses and feelings about us, their wor…

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Illusion, Relative and Absolute walk into a bar

Dating

I was on a first date a couple of years ago, a drink in a pub as it happens, and of course he asked the question ‘What do you do?’.

‘I run programmes that explore reality and that there is no objective self and other’, I said.

‘Isn’t that a bit woo-woo?’ he asked. (Which actually was an improvement on the ‘Right…’ and tumbleweed of other dates I have had.)

And I launched into a defence of this exploration. Which the grip of tension, offence and resentment in my body clearly showed was nothing…

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Denial and Intimacy [excerpt from WELL, getting real with physical and mental health]

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I was at a non-duality retreat and asked a question about the brain.

‘There is no brain’ came the immediate reply. And, ultimately, we can’t argue with that. This is true. There is no objective reality of the brain. Just as there is no objective reality of anything. An entire reality held in perception. No self. No other. No brain.

But if we have concussion or dizziness or constant headaches, to tell ourselves ‘there is no brain’ and equally ‘there is no concussion or dizziness or headache’ se…

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Subliminal Recordings

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Subliminal Recordings

What are they?

Subliminal recordings are a consciously audible sound such as relaxing music, rain or waves playing over the top of a recording that is just below the conscious threshold of hearing.

How do they work?

First off, let’s distinguish between two categories of sounds - subliminal and supraliminal.

Subliminal refers to information that is below the level of conscious perception.

Supraliminal refers to information that is available for conscious perception eve…

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Listening

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[Excerpt from EASE, getting real with work]

My colleague was doing an MBA and one of his text books had a chapter on listening. He sent me the summary box from the chapter of the 20 things to do in order to become a better listener.

Things like:

‘make sure to maintain some eye contact but not so much as to intimidate’,

‘nod or make affirmative noises when the speaker pauses’

‘notice their body language and what it indicates about their emotional state’.

And so it went on.

All very sens…

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