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Beyond the fear of an insecure self
It really looks like our happiness, security and well-being depend on the actions and words of others.
At the level of physical impact it is certainly true that the behaviours of this body here can cause that body there physical harm and vice versa.
It really makes sense that this body here would move out of the way of whatever would damage it.
We see this happening all the time as the form moves away from anything that would threaten that form. Zebras run from the pride of lions. Plants move o…
At the level of physical impact it is certainly true that the behaviours of this body here can cause that body there physical harm and vice versa.
It really makes sense that this body here would move out of the way of whatever would damage it.
We see this happening all the time as the form moves away from anything that would threaten that form. Zebras run from the pride of lions. Plants move o…
Ready for it?
READY FOR IT?
The lottery started in the UK in 1994 and my sister suggested that our family should have a syndicate. Every Saturday we sat in the living room seeing if our numbers would come up. My 93 year old grandmother would sit there, not saying a word, hardly breathing until all the numbers had been chosen. Then, when, once again, it was clear we hadn’t won anything she would let out a sigh of relief and thank God for sparing us…
Her relief often comes to mind when people describe their dream…
The lottery started in the UK in 1994 and my sister suggested that our family should have a syndicate. Every Saturday we sat in the living room seeing if our numbers would come up. My 93 year old grandmother would sit there, not saying a word, hardly breathing until all the numbers had been chosen. Then, when, once again, it was clear we hadn’t won anything she would let out a sigh of relief and thank God for sparing us…
Her relief often comes to mind when people describe their dream…
The only impediment to human potential (and boy have we got it so wrong)
“Turn the keys in the ignition.”
OMG OMG OMG The engine is on OMG OMG
“This is the gear stick. Press your left foot down. And push the gear stick into 1st. This is the hand brake. Release the handbrake.”
OMG OMG OMG The engine is on. OMG OMG OMG.
“Release the handbrake.”
OMG WHAT’S GOING TO HAPPEN WE ARE ALL GOING TO DIE
“Clare… Can you hear me..? I said ‘Release the handbrake.”
OMG OMG OMG THE CAR IS MOVING IT IS MOVING ON A ROAD AN ACTUAL ROAD I AM DRIVING ON A ROAD A ROAD WITH CARS OMG OMG OMG. WE…
OMG OMG OMG The engine is on OMG OMG
“This is the gear stick. Press your left foot down. And push the gear stick into 1st. This is the hand brake. Release the handbrake.”
OMG OMG OMG The engine is on. OMG OMG OMG.
“Release the handbrake.”
OMG WHAT’S GOING TO HAPPEN WE ARE ALL GOING TO DIE
“Clare… Can you hear me..? I said ‘Release the handbrake.”
OMG OMG OMG THE CAR IS MOVING IT IS MOVING ON A ROAD AN ACTUAL ROAD I AM DRIVING ON A ROAD A ROAD WITH CARS OMG OMG OMG. WE…
UP AND DOWN (Maslow revisited)
Maslow gave us a nice pyramid. Human needs. A hierarchy.
The theory goes that we meet the needs at one level and move up.
This seems to makes sense.
Searching for food, water, warmth and shelter could take all the attention until they are found.
Then there would be space to go after the psychological needs - feelings of belonging and intimacy and accomplishment.
Then once we have these, on to the very top: self actualisation - achieving full potential, respect and creativity.
The pinnacle of the pyram…
GREEDY
In a conference on building mega brands and mega businesses, years ago, my colleague Nicola Bird asked the only question that mattered: ‘How do we know when to stop? What is enough?’
The seminar leader couldn’t answer.
‘Enough’ was, for that leader, an unexplored concept. And this lack of enquiry, this assumption that the next thing is always, unfailingly necessary and better meant the underlying theme of the conference was actually ‘how to spend your life in relentless seeking’. With break-out mo…
The seminar leader couldn’t answer.
‘Enough’ was, for that leader, an unexplored concept. And this lack of enquiry, this assumption that the next thing is always, unfailingly necessary and better meant the underlying theme of the conference was actually ‘how to spend your life in relentless seeking’. With break-out mo…
The Real Law of Attraction
The law of attraction tells us that our thoughts create our reality and that if we change our thoughts we can change our lives. It says that through controlling what we believe we can draw into our life everything we have ever wanted - the partner of our dreams, the lottery win, the new job, the good health, the perfect house, the shiny new car, even an empty parking space.
In other words, if we just believe enough then the seeking, the envy, the unfulfilled desire, the bitterness, the inconvenie…
In other words, if we just believe enough then the seeking, the envy, the unfulfilled desire, the bitterness, the inconvenie…
Through it
“We can’t go under it. We can’t go over it. Oh no! We have to go through it.”
That’s a line repeated over and over and over again in a kids’ book about a bear hunt. To find the bear, a family has to go right through all sorts of elements - mud, a river, a forest, a cave. They can’t go under or over, they have to go through.
So they go through it and, in the book, the obstacle is exactly as it had appeared to be. The mud is thick and oozy. The river is deep and cold. The forest is big and dark. The…
That’s a line repeated over and over and over again in a kids’ book about a bear hunt. To find the bear, a family has to go right through all sorts of elements - mud, a river, a forest, a cave. They can’t go under or over, they have to go through.
So they go through it and, in the book, the obstacle is exactly as it had appeared to be. The mud is thick and oozy. The river is deep and cold. The forest is big and dark. The…
If you are wise enough to let it, the world will destroy you
[Photo credit: artist and illustrator, Siri Stiklestad Opli http://www.fjellbjorka.no]
Not YOU of course. Not the you you really are. No I mean the idea of who you are. The identity. The insecure, vulnerable self that we believe ourselves to be. That’s the you we are talking about here.
This idea of self is a creation of thought. It is a collage of whatever is believed from infinite hand me down thought, conditioned thought, collective thought, ancestral thought, generational thought, caveman thou…
Not YOU of course. Not the you you really are. No I mean the idea of who you are. The identity. The insecure, vulnerable self that we believe ourselves to be. That’s the you we are talking about here.
This idea of self is a creation of thought. It is a collage of whatever is believed from infinite hand me down thought, conditioned thought, collective thought, ancestral thought, generational thought, caveman thou…
NO DO-ER DOING
[Photo credit: artist and illustrator, Siri Stiklestad Opli http://www.fjellbjorka.no]
Crawling is happening. Parents and grandparents exclaim ‘Well done baby! You are crawling!’
Walking is happening. The people around say ‘You can walk! Clever child!’
Talking is happening. The shop assistant says ‘Listen to you talking! Aren’t you great!’
Writing with crayons on paper is happening. Your pre-school teachers say ‘You are writing! Well done!’ And they press a star sticker on your t-shirt.
Writing with…
Crawling is happening. Parents and grandparents exclaim ‘Well done baby! You are crawling!’
Walking is happening. The people around say ‘You can walk! Clever child!’
Talking is happening. The shop assistant says ‘Listen to you talking! Aren’t you great!’
Writing with crayons on paper is happening. Your pre-school teachers say ‘You are writing! Well done!’ And they press a star sticker on your t-shirt.
Writing with…
Breaking up isn't hard to do. It's impossible.
[Photo credit: artist and illustrator, Siri Stiklestad Opli http://www.fjellbjorka.no]
How do we get over someone leaving us?
How do we cope with the stand off after a row?
How do we mend a broken heart?
We don’t. We can’t.
It’s not just hard to break up. It is literally impossible.
It’s impossible to come to terms with any sort of separation because… well… separation isn’t possible.
It looks like it is. It looks like it is a fact of life, a way of life …
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